My former business partner is back in town and asking my kids for money.

Rock, many years ago a former business partner and I parted ways. I was relieved to see him go. He was a charismatic person, but a bad partner. He had no sense whatsoever. I was always nervous he was going to run our label converting business into the ground with one risky deal after another.

My kids were young when this partner was in the picture. Since then, the kids have grown up and bought my business.

Recently my ex-partner resurfaced like a bad egg. He has approached my kids and filled their heads with his crazy schemes. He asked them for money for ideas that will supposedly “benefit the business.” I’m sick to my stomach with stress about this.

If you didn’t know his track record, his enthusiasm and creativity might seem exciting. No matter how good his ideas are, however, he messes them up and makes things worse.

My oldest son thinks I have other baggage that is influencing my mistrust of my ex-partner. Yes, there are personal issues as well — but mostly I don’t want my kids taking advice from someone like him. Your thoughts?

Life can get messy at times. I get the feeling there are sensitive issues around the breakup of your label business partnership. Maybe your kids know part of the story but not all. Maybe you are not the hero of that story.

Having baggage makes it more difficult, for sure. You are trying to give your advice so it doesn’t cause divisiveness or push your kids into the arms of this charismatic former partner.

Let’s think about this from the perspective of your kids. As owners, they have to deal with business and money decisions all the time. They have to evaluate ideas and filter out all the other crazy schemers who want something. How do they handle major business decisions? Who advises them on money issues? Who do they consult? Do they generally have what you call good sense? I bet they do since you agreed to sell them your business.

I think what you are looking for here is an ally who will agree with you. Very simply, you want to tell your kids that your former partner should not be trusted with money since he does not have good sense or the ability to follow through successfully. The other baggage needs to be discarded.

Is there a person who advises the family who could serve in the role of an advocate? Perhaps the family attorney, your CPA, a trusted family member, family counselor, business advisor, your priest or minister, or someone who can discuss this without it seeming like there is a personal ax to grind?

I am happy to hear that you trust your kids with the label business and that you want good things for them. Not all families have the best interest of the group at heart. I don’t offer this to everyone, but please consider our expert services here at LaManna Consulting Group. We focus on integrity, transparency, and rising above past grievances. If you think we could help you confidentially evaluate this situation and be the experienced voice of wisdom, give us a call.